The Man's Brand

YOU are the man…now start acting like it.

The Mancinerator

November 13th, 2012

Tired of boring-ass paper shredding to destroy documents. Yea, so were we. Until, we created The Mancinerator.

 

It’s a can…with a hole in the bottom! Legend…. Dairy. You wad up the paper, put a match in the bottom and BAM! No more unwanted documents. Plus, you can stand around and drink beer and shoot the shit while you watch it burn. You  ain’t gonna get that from no sissy-ass “document shredder”.

Beer of the Month Nov 12

November 13th, 2012

You can find a lot of good beers in the store but you can’t find…wait for it…HOME-BREW. It just so happens, my Pops has been brewing beer for the last, oh about 15 years. And, needless to say it is damn good.

Troy

May 13th, 2012

The Man's Brand movie MANalysis - TroyF*#@in-A!!! Such a badass movie!! BAM!!!! Although… I do have some Manalysies I would like to point out. Fist of all, i would like to say, talk about a lot of freakin’ awesome fight scenes! Especially the first good one. The jump & the throat stab… classic! Now, let me get into my disputes with this movie.

 

MutherFU*#@er… Orlando Bloom be thy name. You pieces of sh*t!!!! After watching this movie, I would like to kill you myself (not really just theoretically speaking).  They take this bullsh*t love story/chick flick aspect to the movie. Let me straighten something out real quick: Orlando Bloom plays a f*cking p*$sy wife grabber and Diane Kruger plays a worthless little whore! Don’t let that bullshit fool you as a love story. Are you f*cking kidding me! Horse Shit.

Orlando Bloom’s character, along with Dian Kruger’s character,  should have been strung up by their feet and had Achilles name BRANDED into their genitals. Then, they should have been torchered. The movie would have been 20, no, 25 times better. Seriously! Think about it. Seeing assholes get killed in battles is deeply satisfying (in movies) but seeing that applied to cheating whores & wife grabbers… that’s a whole ‘nother level of classic.

Look, I know this is a harsh analysis but I am tired of seeing horseshit values placed (discretely) into movies. It’s crap. It’s a big part of why our shit society is such crap… no, let me reword that: F*CKING SH*****T!!!!!! Social brainwashing. This is not OK!!!! F*ck You Hollywood. Your welcome. You have ruined the sheep of our society. Go to HELL!!!!

Whoa, I gotta slow down. All that being said, stellar freakin’ movie. BAD ASS. Love it. Thank you to Mother’s Day for bestowing such a great movie upon our family that has some good historical value. And, thank you to my wife for being such a great mom & wife… couldn’t ask for more. 😉

Happy Mother’s Day to All!

Beer of the Month March 12

April 20th, 2012

Sam AdamsSam Adams, be thine founding fathers name. Never would you have guessed you would become the poster-man of an utterly astounding empire of amazingly head-giving brews. I’m talking foam here asshole, get your mind out of the gutter. JUST KIDDING. As men, we hold the divine right to put our head wherever it fits best. Be it a warm wet place – like the stream of a hot shower in the morning (although that’s not the warm wet place that first comes to my filthy mind), or in a cold dirty gutter, dazed from the liver shattering night before.

Shit, lost my train of thought there. One mention of “head” & it all goes downhill. Anyway, Sam Adams… what an outstanding brewing company. It’s like the blue coat of free beers, in a battle overwhelmed by red coats of shame, asshole accents and tyranny. It is the tasteful yet robust premium line of reasonably priced beers surrounded by an isle filled with overpriced crap, horse piss and shit.

I will take a Sam Adams Ma’am… may I have another.

Take that liver!

Predator

April 2nd, 2012
Predator

The MANalysis of Predator

I am glad to say that today was Sunday & in my house, that means: Family Movie Night. Time to introduce the kids to Predator. One of the greatest movies of all time. I remember watching this piece of outstanding cinema classic with my dad at about the same age my son is. One of the many things I share with my Pops is that this is one of the greatest movies ever made and without a doubt, the best flick Schwarzenegger ever partook in. Termanator was high up on the list, but Mr. Governator, you should have followed up Predator with Predator 2 and never looked back. It would have set the foundation for much greater things in your career than being the governor of Cali.

I can only hope to share with my son the unspoken deep sense of pride and class that comes with knowing another member of your family can honestly notch this into their top five favorite movies of all times. It makes me proud to be able to agree with another member of the same stature on an issue of such profound nature. It becomes clear than we are one step closer to “Mantopia”.

One Man’s Loss

March 27th, 2012

One Man’s Loss Is Another’s Gain

Fishing Gear
No sense in wasting some perfectly good fishin’ gear. My son & daughter found these while we were walking the beach. When the damn is low, the water-line gets plenty low enough to get to a lot of area that would otherwise be covered in water. As you can still barely see on the sign, there is a big ass rock here. I am guessing that some dumb-ass hit that & complained to the park until they put a sign up. Then they used some of our tax dollars to pay for it. I should go fix that sign to read: There’s a big f$#k@ng rock here… DUMB-ASS!! I would even do it for free. Enjoy the beach pics.
Man's Brand Big Rock
The Beach & Mountains
The Beach & Mountains2
The Beach
The Beach2

Shave and a Haircut

March 22nd, 2012

Shave and a Haircut…2 Beers

Shave an haircut, 2 beersI cut beers for hair… er, I cut hairs for beer. Seems these days there ain’t too many men that are man enough pick up a pair of scissors and cut some hair. They all have to go to the girly salon and get their hair cut by the girly-man. Well, I’m proud to say I paid the less for a pair hair clippers, than I would have for my boys hair cut. ‘An I cut it myself. Looks damn good too. he looks like a bad-ass. That’s my boy!

And, I’m not ashamed to say: I did it while I had a couple beers. It helps clear the senses and clears up visual judgement I must say.

It’s a Man’s World

March 18th, 2012

It’s a Man’s World. We’ve let you have your fun. Now we’re taking it back bitches! Don’t let the door hit you in the vagina on the way out. But, don’t go too far in case we need you to grab us a beer.